Sunday, August 29, 2004

Hope Springs or Sprang!

What a stupid, stupid movie. Hope Springs that is. I was looking forward to immersing myself in a funny, romantic comedy this afternoon, but instead I just spent the last hour and a half waiting for something to get better.

What I want to know is, how do you get a movie full of established actors and the movie turns out to be a flop? Colin Firth, Minnie Driver, Mary Steenburgen; they are all established actors. So what the hell happened? I'm not commenting on Heather Graham because I've never seen her in anything before, nor am I interested in seeing her in anything again. What a total dud. She may be the reason why this movie sucked so much. Actually, it isn't her fault, more likely the asshole who created that character. What a lame character. Someone who has to guzzle half a bottle of whiskey in the car before she shows a tourist a local attraction, because she's nervous? Come on and then afterwards, expresses her joy by stripping naked in his room, which incidentally just happens to lead them to jump into bed together where they attempt to have sex. Even that was not a success. But for some strange reason he is drawn to this clueless, blond bimbo like a moth to a flame.

His attraction only grows stronger when his fiance arrives, even though the contrast between intelligent, sexy, sophisticated, Vera and weird, silly, Mandy is like comparing a Filet Mignon to a Big Mac.

This movie is actually based on a novel, New Cardiff written by Charles Webb, the author of The Graduate. How disappointing. If the movie had been a good movie, I most likely would have decided to read the book, but I will definitely not waste my time now. Perhaps that isn't fair, and perhaps the book is better than the movie, they usually are, but not so according to a short review I just read here.

Well, if I suceed with my objective by writing this review, to save you the $4.00 rental fee, then I will be happy.

Now onto other more pressing issues. Today was supposed to be another visit with the Grandparent's. We (my mother and I) left early this morning. Early for me on a weekend. It was 9:55am when we said our goodbye's to Sammy, the dog. Sounds easy doesn't it? To say goodbye to Sammy. But that's where you are wrong. It's a difficult thing for my mother to say goodbye, if even for a few hours, to her precious.

I try not to get jealous of her affection for my dog. I can drive, afterall. He can't. So what if he's cute and my Mom can read his mind. I know that I am a good person, goddammit, and I can drive.

I'm rambling, getting caught up in the anxiety of my own insecurities. Please forgive me. We did leave the apartment only an hour after our planned departure and headed on the open highway to Bowmanville.

It was pissing cats and dogs when I pulled out of the underground garage and I knew that this would make my Mother nervous.

"Do you think we should go?"

"Oh yes, I'm alright Shelly, just drive carefully, you know how slick the roads can be when they're wet."

"Yes Mother, I know."

Carefully I drove through the sidestreets of Mississauga and carefully merged onto highway 410 North to the 407. The rain pelted the car mercilessly. The sky grew dark as the rain poured down even harder. I could feel my car start to hydroplane ever so slightly at the exact moment that I felt my mom's body stiffen.

"Do you think we should continue?"

"No, I really don't see any clearing of any sort Shelly, and we've been on the highway for half an hour. I say get off at the next exit, now."

And that was it. Our journey was cut short. Off the highway I went and made a big circle back home. Oh well, I can read this afternoon, or maybe I'll rent a movie. Yes that's the ticket.

That's how I ended up departing with $4.00 and sitting through that horrible movie. It's Mother Nature's fault. If it hadn't been for the rain, I would have been sitting comfortably in my Grandparent's home, listening to my Grandfather retell his favourite stories.

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